228 Days

Recently, Jeff, Josh, Jared, and I took a canoe trip down the Cahaba River in Alabama. This is a picture of Jeff and Jared shooting a 4 foot waterfall. We were all a little scared of doing it and considered portaging around. In the end, however, we went for it.

Courage is an odd thing. It can be summoned. It propels us to confront our fear of the future.

But, beloved, God Most High knows the future, your future, every day, every hour. They are all in His loving hands. Your future is secure. Your destiny is sealed in Him.

Courage gains strength as it is called forth. Nicodemus first came to Jesus under the cover of darkness. Later, he debated the legality of Jesus' trial before the Sanhedrin. Finally, he asked Pilate for Jesus' body. His courage grew as he exercised it.

228 days ago, we began a journey into darkness. I don't know how long it will be. I don't know the destination. I don't know what perils await us. But our God's seal of approval is stamped on every day. He is well pleased with the courage of those who call Jesus Lord and lift up their prayers on behalf of Valerie, Chris, and the boys.

Although we have been on a rocky road recently, yesterday's visit to USC Norris was good news all around. Temperature normal. Weight 125 (we want 132). BP 118/80 (perfect!). Bilirubin down, liver enzymes down. Platelets up. And best of all, the CT shows significant tumor shrinkage!

The hardest thing we are dealing with now is nausea and pain. Please pray that Val has great wisdom in managing these two demons.

Finally, please pray that God would come alongside Val and sustain her. It's easy to overcome the fear of shooting a waterfall that passes in a moment, but hard to endure an enemy that has persisted so long with no end in sight.

It is good to remember Paul's admonition in His Letter to the Church at Phillipi, "Brothers, I do not consider myself to have apprehended it but one thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining for what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus".

Forget the 228 days. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives.

Sunday June 25

It's Sunday night and I have been trying to lay low today since the infection takes a few days to go away. Kelly and Dan across the street BBQed tonight and fed my whole family, so tonight was easy for me. Thanks Dan and Kelly for always taking care of us. Dinner, swimming movies etc... It has helped us out alot.
This is a picture of Tyler and I at The Wave for Ryan's camp day and a picture of Gavin and I rollerskating with Ryans school at Ups and Downs. These are all Ryan's parties but he is so on the move it is hard to catch him in a picture these days. I love my boys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Val

Val to Scripps La Jolla Again

Val had to go down to Scripps La Jolla Hospital this morning at 4:00am. She has been trying to get a handle on her pain again the last few days unsuccessfully. I don't know all of the details, but she developed a fever and coupled with the pain it got to a point where she needed to go in. The doctors said that she has an infection in and water at the head of her pancreas assumably from the pancreatitis.

My mom (who has the boys at the house) said that they decided not to admit her and they are giving her what she needs for the pain and infection. She should be coming home this afternoon.

Please pray today for Val for God's hand of peace and comfort to surround her. That the infection will clear quickly. Also that the pancreas will heal quickly and that the stent will not get infected.

I am continually amazed at the number of people I meet or talk to that check this blog and pray for Val and our family. God is so good to give us a such an wonderful community of believers all around the world to lift one another up in times of trouble. I am so encouraged by that.

Thank you so very much.


Val's sister Julie

Hello from Prattville Alabama

The dirt is red and there are no end to trees. Homes are built with an acre of grass in the front yard. We are surprised that there are no mosquitoes. Horse flies as big as quarters.

It has been so nice to be with Jeff and family for this week. They are out the door early today as they are in charge of the Junior High Group for Bible School at Prattville First Baptist Church. I've never been in a place that has a church on every corner.

Jeff has had the week off and has taken dad on some brutal distance runs in the woods and hills. It has been in the 90's with humidity in the 90's. They have also been flying the radio control airplane in a huge open field.

The heat doesn't stop the activities around here with 4 kids. Josh 13 and Jared 8 are on an "all stars" baseball team. Jessica and Jared are on a swim team. The kitchen is never closed. Janet is on top of her game. They have a deer lick on the edge of their property next to the woods. We have watched deer every night.

God is good. Dad and I were so anxious about leaving you this week. As Bible school began on Monday, their emphasis has been on courage. How appropriate that the verse for the week is Josuha 1:9"Have I not commanded you? Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

I love you,

Mom

Scan Results

Val and I went up to USC Thursday for her Chemo and Scan results. Dr. Lenz said “everything is stable and there is no new growth in the large tumor by the bile duct or any of the tumors”. This was a big relief. He was a little puzzled on how the bile duct could have pressure on it from the tumor but with out it increasing size. His explanation was that it can become denser inside and have more pressure. Val and I said as long as it’s not growing will take it. Going into the appt. we weren’t sure that we were going to get the news that we wanted. This scan was the first results of the current Chemo mix of Avastin, 5FU and Tarceva. The blood counts look good as well. Her Bilirubin is down and in normal range. Her Platelets are up above 100 and most other results are all in range. Dr. Lenz said there is no need to switch Chemo drugs when it’s working. He said with the blood results we could add one other drug or up the current mix. He thought it would be best to double the dose of Avastine to 10 mg, bring back the original dose of 5FU to 1800. With her side effects of the lower Lip feeling very burned now gone he said there should be no problem. For Tarceva it’s still one pill each night.

She seemed to be doing fine today. Also given that she has the 5FU pump on her. She puts it in her pocket and people think nothing of it since it looks like a baby bottle. She was up at 8:30 and was cleaning away. She brought the kids swimming and worked on a new picture frame that she is putting about 20 smaller pictures in. She even cleaned the entire up stairs and reorganized the playroom for the Kids. Tonight we went out to eat and walked around Cruising Grand, which is a big out door car show, and the Kids had a blast. Tyler our 22 month old is so funny lately. He just started to say No yesterday and he is making Val and I laugh all the time. We call him our “little Pistol”.

Val is just so relentless in this fight. She is by far the strongest woman I have ever met. She never complains and just goes. I’m so blessed to have such an incredible wife!!

Please pray for:
- She has continued strength during the increased Chemo Mix
- The stent continues to work and function perfect
- The disease / Tumors start to shrink in size
- She can have peace with her mind
- She can enjoy quality time with the kids over the summer

Thanks for everyone’s support and prayers. We are so lucky to have such incredible friends and support around in the time of need and I just want to say thanks for all the effort!!

-Chris

Trip to USC

Went to USC today for a CT scan. My doctor wanted a scan even though it has only been 4 weeks. Last weeks stent situation has left him perplexed as to what is going on. I get the scan results Thursday when I go back up there and depending on the scan results I will either get the chemo I am on or discuss switching to something more aggressive now that my platelets have come up to 125.
Chris and I took baby Tyler with us to USC and Gavin and Ryan went to Lego Land with Dawn. On our way home from USC we stopped in San Clemente Beach around 5:30. It was so clear and so beautiful. There were no clouds in the sky. It felt good to breathe deep into my lungs the ocean air. We pushed Baby Tyler on the swings and watched him on the slide. Tyler loves the beach. He say's "beech, beech" like a 2 year old would say. This summer will be fun and Tyler will have many beach days! It was nice to have some alone time with Chris. There seems to be so much drama in our lives, even though I live with him and see him, I still miss him.
I love you Chris!
Val

The Race

I read this quote today and thought how appropriate this was for me...

Release...the regrets from yesterday
Refuse...the fear of tomorrow
Receive, instead...the peace of today

Lord,
You are the author of my faith... the One who initiated my relationship with you, the One who chose me. You are also the perfecter of my faith. How grateful I am for the confidence I can have that You began a good work in me and that you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. I praise you for your promise to rescue and protect me. You will be with me in times of trouble , deliver me and honor me. You will be with me forever.

Help me throw off everything that hinders me from complete trust in you. I want to run with perserverance the race set before me. For my sake, You endured the cross and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. That you would do all this for me is amazing. I praise your holy name.

Valerie
Praying Through Cancer-Susan Sorrensan

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. Hebrews 12:12

Sat. June 10th

Most of you that know me and see me everyday will not by it when I say, I have been feeling fine these last few days. I am a good faker, as you all know. From the procedure, I got pancreatitis, which is imflamation of the pancreas. Great hugh? It has not been fun to say the least. It is supossed to go away by itself, so hopefully today I will turn the corner. I go to USC next week for a scan and with those results we will either stay on the current drugs or if my platlet count has come up, may switch me back to the drugs I was on before. My doctors concern is "why did the tumor press on the ducts if shrinksge was occuring?". I will find out next week. Thanks for all the prayers. I have my faithful prayer team. I appreciate all of you. God is with me always and is using this for his greater plan. I have seen it with my own eyes this week.
It is all part of his healing plan for me.

Ryan graduated from Kindergarden last night. It was sooooo cute. Next week Gavin graduates from Pre-school and summer here we come. We are going to a bible camp at Valley Christian School for a week, a soccer camp for the boys who start soccer in the fall and the rest of the time sleep in.

Have a good weekend!
Luv,
Val

Stent Placement

Yesterday Val got her stent procedure done at Scripps La Jolla. Thankfully she only needed one stent instead of two. The two bile ducts that were constricted came together as "Y" shape so the doctor was able to place one stent to open both passages as the converged together. The one stent is better than two since it decreases her chances for infection, and one less foreign object in her body means less internal stress. The procedure went almost flawlessly. While inserting the stent, the doctor nicked the pancreas with his imaging guide. We don't really know if this is a big deal or not, but Val is in alot of pain. She also was up all night not feeling well. The doctor said that she really shouldn't be in so much pain from the procedure so now we are left wondering if there was damage done to her pancreas. She is going to USC Norris tomorrow to see Dr. Lenz to evaluate the MRI/MRCP and Val's pain situation. It is not a chemo day.

On a positive note, her jaundice has gone away and her beautiful coloring is back. So the procedure was a success!

Please pray that her pain will stop, that she can sleep, and that she will not get an infection from the stent. Also if there is any damage to the pancreas that it will heal quickly and not get infected either. As alway pray for God's perfect peace, comfort, rest, and healing.

Thank you......

Julie

Persistence

The theme of this piece came from an excellent message by Dennis Keating last Sunday at Emmanuel Faith Church. Thanks for your faithfulness Dennis!

The Rock-n-Roll Marathon was run yesterday in San Diego. Having been a distance runner for 32 years, I know what it is like on a hot summer's day when your body tells you to stop but from somewhere deep inside comes the voice that says, "just keep putting one foot ahead of the other."

Webster defines persistence as; steady perseverance, unyielding tenacity, holding on to a course of action in spite of difficulties.

Perseverance and persistance can be seen in the chicken and the egg. A baby chick, approaching full life, finds himself in a nice, safe environment. Soon however, the chick becomes aware that the shell keeping him safe and comfortable is also confining him. He finds himself restricted and begins pecking at the shell. He pecks and pecks, working very hard, gaining strength hour by hour through the struggle.

Before long, the chick has attained the strength and endurance to cope with a new environment and breaks through the shell. The chick continues to peck and soon he is free, ready for a new level of life. Well-meaning people have tried to help little chicks speed up the process by cracking or peeling the shell away to help open it for them. The chicks do not develop the strength to cope with their new environment and soon die.

Consider the story of John Stephen Akhawari;

At 7:00 pm on October 20, 1968, only a few thousand spectators remained in Mexico City's Olympic Stadium. Finally, spectators heard the wail of police sirens outside the stadium. A lone runner wearing the colors of Tanzania staggered into the stadium. John Stephan Akhawari was the last contestant to finish the 26.2 mile race. His leg injured in a fall, bloodied and crudely bandaged, He hobbled the final lap around the track.

The crowd rose to their feet and applauded him as if he were the Gold Medal Champion. After the race, a reporter asked him why he had not quit. His reply, "My country did not send me 7,000 miles to start the race. They sent me to finish it."

The Lord Jesus had a moment in the Garden of Gethsemane where he was tempted to quit the race. But as he prayed, God the Father reminded Him that He did not send Him to start the race but to finish it. Our Saviour finished His race at Calvary, and declared, "it is finished."

And now, beloved, it is our turn to run the race. As the Writer to the Hebrews declares"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles us, and let us run with perseverence the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith,"

Tonight, Valerie is that runner approaching the Mexico City Arena, injured and alone. But inside are waiting "that great cloud of witnesses" that God has declared are watching her. And all of you are there, beloved, as is the Lord Jesus Himself.

Tomorrow, Dr. Goldklang will implant (2) temporary plastic stents at Scripps Memorial to open the bile ducts and restore proper flow out of the liver. Pray for supernatural skills for the medical team. Especially pray that this laparscopic insertion through the mouth is done so that Val does not experience the severe pain that accompanied the last procedure of this type. This seems to occur when they are too hard manipulating the patient's neck. Pray that there are no complications or infections after the procedure.

On Thursday, we are going up to USC Norris to see Dr. Lenz. Pray that he can make sense of the CD for the MRI/MRCP from Scripps. I think we will be getting another CT scan at USC this Thursday. Pray for great wisdom on his part as to the cause of this blockage. Val mentioned that it may have been caused by the Pilates she has been doing.

Thanks Dean for calling in that prescription last night!

Godspeed

It's me Val

Hi everyone.
Just wanted to let you know I am feeling OK. A bit jaundice (I have a tint of yellowing to my skin). I caught it early and am not really sick from it. A question that runs through everyones mind is "why is this happening if the chemo was working?" I have always had a tumor inbetween the bile ducts. My surgeon said last night, even if it shifts or grows even just a small amount, this could have happened. I am still on course mentally and physically.

Lord,
I lay myself at your feet. I am not my own. You bought me with a price. Every breath has already been ordained by you and all my days have been written in your book of life. There is nothing ahead of me that that can detour Your will for my life. I praise you for your unfailing love. I trust you implicitly. May this trial and test in my life show my true faith in you and that I may come forth as gold.

But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.
Job23:10

Thank you for your word Lord.

Amen

Weekend at Home

Val being Val, she went straight to Dr. Goldsmith's office instead of waiting in the ER at Scripps La Jolla (if she had, she would probably still be there...). The Dr. wanted to get an MRI done and decided that she could spend the weekend at home and have the procedure done on Tuesday. This would allow Dr. Goldsmith to assemble the best team and not place the stents in on an emergency basis. I was not totally correct about the "sludge" comment. Basically, Val has a tumor in between two bilary ducts and the tumor is putting enough pressure on the ducts to close them off. Val will have a stent placed in both of her blocked bilary ducts, Thankfully, the procedure is done with out an incision and she may be able to go home on the same day.

Val is still jaundiced and feels sickly because of the bile backing up in her body. A big prayer is that she does not get a fever this weekend in which case she will have to go to the ER. Of course she is a bit anxious about this possibility so pray for her peace and comfort as well.

Next week was going to be quite busy at the McCrea house with all of the special end-of-the-year activities at school, and adding this procedure on Tuesday will make it even more of a challenging week. Please pray that next week goes smoothly for everyone in their household.

Thank you for continued prayer and support for Val and her family.

Julie

Val to Scripps La Jolla

As of 1:00 this afternoon (Friday) Val and Chris are on the way down to Scripps La Jolla Hospital. Because of "sludge" in her bile ducts the doctor told her to go to the ER if she becomes jaundiced - well since my dad's post this morning she has yellowed. This probably means she will need a surgical procedure called a stent. A stent is placed in the bilary duct to open the passage for bile to pass through and relieve the clog.

She will know more once she is checked in and evaluated, but please pray for her. Pray that if a stent is necessary that the procedure would go smoothly and Val would be comforted duing her stay at the hospital. Pray that she can return home quickly and her body will quickly adapt and be relieved. Pray for my parents and the McCrea kids this weekend. Above all pray for God's perfect peace, comfort and healing.

Many thanks, Julie

Tyler's Thing

Whenever grandpa's little white Corolla rolls up to Val's house, Tyler is out in a flash to get the plane out of the trunk and up in the sky. Arriving without the plane is not feasible.

Last Thursday, Nancy and I arrived at Val's house at 5:45 am to travel with her and Chris to USC Norris. Val was sick, having been up all night with Chris, who was struggling with a recurrence of Crohn's. The decision was made to send Val and I to USC. Nancy would stay with the Chris and the troops in Stone Canyon.

We fired up the Chrysler 300 and head El Norte for the two hour drive to LA. Val was sleeping in the back seat and I dialed the cruise to 80 in the commuter lane, hoping not to get busted for (a) speeding or (b) having only one person in the car since Val is not visible through the windows.

We checked in at USC and went to "Blood Draw". Sadly, USC does not have good needle nurses. A painful reality for Val. After this, we consult with Taleen, Dr. Lenz' Nurse Practitioner. Val's weight, BP, and temperature are right on the numbers but she feels like #@*& physically and emotionally.

Dr. Lenz comes in and we discuss the radiology report. The results; slight shrinkage observed in the large (6.7 cm) tumor, no change in the shadows observed since October in the lungs, inconconclusive on the enlarged head of the pancreatic lymph nodes, also observed in previous scans. He asks if we would like to see the films and we are out of the exam room in a flash. Going out into the hallway I see an entire wall of films and ask which picture are Val's. "All of them", said Dr. Lenz, and he proceeds to explain the details. The large tumor is located in the right lobe of the liver, probably surrounding the bile duct. The left lobe has numerous small tumors.

The goal is to shrink the tumors in the left lobe until a PET shows a low enough metabolic activity to move ahead with a surgical procedure called re-section. This involves removing all or a portion of the left lobe containing the large tumor. The liver (the largest organ in the body) has the amazing ability of regenerating itself with 8 weeks!

Val asks Dr. Lenz if she can postpone her Chemo infusion of Avastin and 5FU/LV for a week. He says ok, adding "we are chasing this disease, it is not chasing us". I liked hearing that!

Finally, The blood results come out of the Lab. High liver enzymes. Not a good thing. Like storm clouds in an otherwise blue sky.

We started home and realized we had forgotton a prescription mouthwash made only by USC. This is needed to deal with the side effects of 5FU. Did a U-turn on I-710 and went back to pick it up.

On the way home, Val asked me why God did not heal her completely in a healing service several weeks ago. I told her that He is healing her day-by-day. If this claim seems almost arrogant to you in light of the elevated liver enzymes, beloved, just look at God's promise to Valerie spoken through the Prophet Jeremiah (29:11). "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

It reminds me of a song I learned years ago, "Little by little every day. Little by little in every way. Jesus is changing me. Sometimes it slow go'in but there's a know'in. someday perfect I will be."

When we returned to Stone Canyon, Nancy and I took the kids to spend the rest of the day at the beach so Val and Chris could get some rest. Char called me that night to tell us that Aunt Nancy from Lakewood, Ohio had died.

Fast forward seven days. It is Thursday (yesterday). Chris and Val go to USC for the postponed Chemo Infusion. Having lost my cell phone, I am out of touch with the world. Paul called me on my land line. Val's liver enzymes and Bilirubin are up. She is at Scripps Encinitas for an Ultrasound to look at the bile duct for possible blockage. I pick her up at 4:15. She looks great to me. No jaundice. We have dinner at Wahoo's, get some takeout for everyone at home and head for Stone Canyon.

Today is Friday. Paul walks into my office and hands me his cell phone. Nancy tells me that USC has received the Ultrasound results from Scripps. No clear conclusions but our enemy is in our face.

Beloved, we are cast down but never destroyed. We are in peril but always our Redeemer is with us.

Your prayers are so important to us. Please pray that we would have wisdom to know if any of the holistic products Val is taking from The Block Institute are interfering with chemotherapy, and that the USC Medical Staff (Dr. Lenz and Taleen Khoukaz) would be highly motivated and filled with discernment in her treatment. Pray that God would intervene and that His mighty hand would reach down and wrench this disease from Val's body.

This is my beloved daughter, whom I love more than life itself.