Always in our Heart

Escondido, California. April 15th, 2012. God has been faithful in our lives beloved since our post one year ago.
Julie is running a half marathon in San Luis Obispo next weekend. This is in honor of her sister Valerie, and to raise funds for the Cholangiocarcinoma Foundation. Thanks to all who have supported her financially.
Valerie and Chris' sons Ryan, Gavin, and Tyler are thriving as they grow too fast toward teenagers. Chris met Jennifer Haroldson on the football field. She has been a great blessing and stabilizing force in their lives. We appreciate her so much!
Chris, Jen, and the boys are at the river this weekend. Jen's three children are there also.
We said goodbye to our San Luis Obispo group last night after a rain soaked few days camping at San Elijo State Beach. Chad, Julie, Kyle, Julianne, Nate, and Brady. It makes me tired just writing their names!
Jeff was recently promoted to full Colonel in the Air Force. He and Jan and their kids, well not really kids anymore, Josh in college, Jessica graduating high school, Jared, Justus, and Jackson live in Wichita Falls, Texas. They are coming in June for a wedding and for hangtime at the beach.
Paul lives in Temecula. We work together at Genentech which has always been a great blessing. He has been dating a girl we all have come to love, Lindsay Wilson.
Beloved, eye has not seen nor has ear heard what our God has in store for those who love Him, who wait for Him, who serve Him and who obey Him. God expects us all to do what we can.
In World War II, Jimmie Stewart (the actor) was a B17 pilot. After returning to base in England, he found that a 20 mm shell had lodged in the fuel tank. They took it apart and found that a note from a Czech worker in a German munitions plant had prevented the shell from exploding. "This is all that I can do for now", said the note.
Do what you can for now, beloved.
Godspeed.

Forever Young. A warrior's tale

Greetings beloved. Friday morning, April 15th, 2011. Early morning. The Sprinter Train is carrying me to work. As I listen and look at the sights and sounds of of a beautiful southern California day ,my mind is quickly transported back to a phone call from my oldest son Jeff. April 15th, 2007. Early evening. "Come quickly", said Jeff from Val's home in San Marcos.

Four years have gone by since our dear Valerie left us for her true home. And ours.

A day has not passed in the life of her mom and I where she has not entered our thoughts. As it should be.

She was a pilgrim and sojourner in our world. A time traveler who spent too little time with us. But, like us today, this was her world too. She lived. She loved. She laughed. She left us with memories of a life well lived. Like the wake of a great ocean liner, her life still ripples through ours.

There was a poem written by Robert Browning Hamilton;

I walked a mile with Pleasure;
She chatted all the way;
But left me none the wiser
For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And ne’er a word said she;
But, oh! The things I learned from her,
When sorrow walked with me.

An Arab proverb, probably says it best, "too much sunshine makes a desert".

I can say with all confidence that the 18 months I spent with Val during her battle were the richest of my life. They re-defined me. They left me so much richer.

And just to add an exclamation mark came January 11th, 2011. As usual, I was out for my routine 6 mile run around El Corazon. Crossing El Camino Real, my mind spaced out and I ran into the path of a Ford truck. Feeling the wind of his side mirror, I kept running, not really sure if I was alive or dead. To be sure someone could still see me in the land of the living, I actually waved at the driver of a big truck coming down the landfill.

I guess I am watching too many movies. The point is, God delivered me that day. The difference between life and death was a fraction of a second. I went home that night and told my wife that I am living on borrowed time. But then, aren't we all?

Recently I was reading to Nancy and Val's sons Gavin, Ryan, and Tyler from John Bunyan's "Pilgrim's Progress". Christian and Hopeful had arrived in Beaulah Land and were about to cross the river to the Celestial City. After they had crossed and were met by the angels, I explained that they had died.

Both Nancy and the boys wouldn't believe me. They thought I was kidding. It couldn't be possible that the heroes of the book just died. Something was very wrong here.

My message to you is this; live each day with great joy. It is a gift of God to you. Receive it from His loving hands. And at the end of your sojourn in this world, the life of the faithful in Christ begins in God's Kingdom.

Godspeed Beloved

Gloria in excelsis Deo

Translated into English, this familiar phrase reads, "glory to God in the highest". The Latin is so much more beautiful!

It has been just over three years beloved, since my beautiful daughter left this Earth for her true home. Like us, she was a pilgrim and a stranger whose time here was, in my value system, too short. But oh how she enriched my life by her presence.

"Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset. Quickly fly the years". Tevya's song from Fiddler on the Roof rings all too true in a father's heart.

And then came to me the wakeup call.

Nancy and I were drinking coffee and enjoying the California sunshine on our deck last Saturday morning. She was reading the North County Times and I was reading Paul's first letter to the Church at Thessalonica.

Paul writes, "Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep,". Other places also speak of the death of a saint as falling asleep. In The Acts of the Apostles, Dr. Luke, in describing the death of Stephen, says, "When he had said this, he fell asleep".

Luke and Paul, writing under divine inspiration, were using something that we humans all understand in describing what it means when a christian dies. Luke and Paul are both in that condition "today", as is our beloved Valerie and all the Saints of God Most High throughout the ages.

We fall asleep at night. We wake up in the morning. Usually, we do not remember the passing of the time in between. Or, another similar experience that many of us have had. We have surgery. The anesthesiologist knocks us out. After perhaps several hours, he wakes us up and it seems like no time has passed at all.

If the saints are asleep, what time is the alarm set for? Paul gives us the answer. "God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him-----and the dead in Christ will rise first. after that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds". There is a wake-up call coming for us beloved. And on that day, the bodies of those who have fallen asleep will be transformed in the twinkling of an eye to be exactly like the glorious body of our Lord Jesus Christ. And in the second twinkle of that eye, the bodies of those saints who are still alive will be transformed. Says paul, "therefore encourage each other with these words".

You may argue, what about Lazarous and the rich man? What about Moses and Elijah meeting Jesus on the mount of transfiguration? What about that great cloud of witnesses referred to in Hebrews? These people weren't asleep were they? Yes they were.

When I wake up, occassionally I will remember a dream. When these saints wake up, they too will remember these events as dreams. The only difference is that their dream was actually an assignment from God to perform a specific task.

The end of this matter beloved, is that when Val wakes up tomorrow morning, so will I.

GodSpeed to all who confess Jesus as Lord of all.

I Dreamed a Dream

Two years ago today, our beloved Valerie left this world. I was so privileged to have her in my life for 38 years.

The last 18 months of her life, we traveled two roads together. One was filled with pain and tears. The other was filled with the glory and presence of our God.

I was forever changed. For the better. Life has never been the same. Our God has never been more real. His blessings are new every morning.

Last night Nancy and I saw an amazing and uplifting video. For those of you who, like Nancy and I, are especially sad today thinking about our beloved, I have included this link to it.

I Dreamed a Dream

The song, I Dreamed a Dream, from Les Miserables, is especially appropriate for me.

In my dream, we are all together, having just arrived in Heaven. Gavin, Ryan, and Tyler are with us. In the distance, Jesus is waiting. Valerie is standing behind Him. He looks at Gavin, Ryan, and Tyler and tells them how pleased He is with them and their faith after losing their mom.

Then he stands aside and they run into the arms of Valerie.
Beloved, this dream is a future event. It will come to pass.

GodSpeed to all who call on the name of God Most High

The Dream

In bed, Escondido, California, 5:45 AM, Monday, 4/13/2009.
I heard Tyler's little feet running toward our bedroom.
As usual, he climbed into bed between Nancy and I. He told me that he had a dream last night. To the best of my recollection, his narrative went like this;
it started at Gavin's baseball practice. Then he talked about Moses and some bad guys with sharks. He saw a man raised from the dead. He saw soldiers beating someone and then talked about Jesus dying on the cross. He mentioned that God was present.
Quite a dream for a 4 year old. A dream for the ages. I leave the interpretation of the dream to you.
For me, it was a golden moment to have Valerie's youngest son snuggled next to me and sharing his dream.

Difficult Moments for a Mom to Remember

When Val went to be with the Lord on April 15, 2007, my heart ached. I had been watching her slowly lose ground. Each time she lost ground physically, God gave that measure back to me in love for her. As she began slipping away, my love for her was beyond comprehension. I laid next to her, I kissed her face and said to her, "Val, I love you so much. If I could choose anyone in this whole world to be my daughter, I would choose you." I was filled with a joy I had never known. I knew God was filling me with his Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 became so real to me. "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may over flow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." "Lord that is it precisely~joy and peace. As Val slipped into eternity, I couldn't get that song, "I'll Fly Away," out of my head. I was so thankful her journey of pain was over and that she was with her Lord in Heaven. The words, "Absent from the body and present with the Lord," never sounded sweeter. I was comforted by the God of all comfort.

These two treasured moments were to difficult to tell anyone without a years' perpective.

About six weeks before Val left us, one evening we were sitting together and I was holding her hand. I could tell she was struggling. I had just taken off my shoes. All of a sudden, she got up and sat on the floor in front of me. She started to massage my feet and I said, "Val, please don't do that, let me massage your feet." She said, "Mother, I must do this for you. There will be a day when you will need me to help you and I will not be there. This is for that time. Let me do this for you now. We both began to cry. We realized this moment would not be relived or forgotten.

As Easter was approaching a few weeks ago, I began reading John 13 and was surprised at what I read.

. . "just before the Passover Feast, Jesus knew that the time had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love. Jesus knew that he had come from God and was returning to God. . .he poured water in a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet."

I was reminded of that night with Val. She was able to show the full extent of her love for me and I didn't see that correlation until then.

Many of Val's friends have become my friends. As the April 15th date looms ahead, I have appreciated having them in my life. They are filling this next week with activities around remembering Val. They know that Julie and her family now live in San Luis Obispo. They know the sadness I feel not having either daughter near.

When the reality of Val not being here set in for Chris and the three boys, it was so tough and a year later continues to be tough. Chris has done an amazing job balancing work and play time. So many teachers, parents, friends and family have helped Chris keep the boys on as normal a schedule as possible. They have fun in their motor home and Chris is helping coach the boys baseball team. When we see Chris, Richard and I wish we could take his pain away. We know that God heals broken hearts.

My Bible study group from Emmanuel Faith went down to Cox Arena to see Beth Moore this weekend. There were 9,000 plus women singing praises to the Lord and it was amazing. I heard this voice behind me say, "Hey Mom." I jumped in my seat and turned around. My heart sank because it sounded just like Val. It wasn't Val and I cried. I miss her more than words can say. As Beth Moore began teaching Psalm 139, I was reminded of my God:

Psalm 139 "O,LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. . .all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

I am known and Valerie is known. She will live on in the hearts of those who love her until Jesus returns.

Thank you dear saints for walking this journey with us. Oh that you could know our heart and see how thankful we are for each of you who have prayed for us.

In the name of our Lord,

Nancy Sloan

Life Is A Journey

The days of our lives are closing in on one year since our beloved left the Earth behind. I think about her every day. No one or nothing can fill the hole her absence has left in our hearts. A couple of weeks ago, we were across the street at Dan's house enjoying his beautiful back yard. A perfect southern California day. Tyler was alone in the jacuzzi and I was watching him. He looked up into the sky and shouted, mommy mommy mommy. Yesterday, I talked to Val's big brother Jeff, shown in the attached picture. He told me that he thinks about her a lot and has had times of sadness as April 15th approaches. I reminded him that God chose him, not us, to be with her when she died. If you want to be reminded of the measure of a man that Jeff became, go back to his "Tribute To Val" video that was posted on Jun 1, 2007. And just this weekend, Nancy came home from a Beth Moore Seminar at Cox Arena. Someone behind her shouted, "mom". To Nancy, it sounded like Val. She, Julie, and Val attended many seminars together in years gone by.

We all miss Val in our own way.

In his Preface to "The Great Divorce", C.S. Lewis said this; "But what, you ask, of Earth? Earth, I think, will not be found by anyone to be a very distinct place. I think Earth, if chosen instead of Heaven, will turn out to have been, all along, only a region of Hell; and Earth, if put second to Heaven, to have been from the beginning a part of Heaven itself."

Not only this valley that we are in, but all our earthly past will have been Heaven to the saved. Once attained, Heaven will work backwards and turn all the sorrows of this life into glory. This transformation begins even before our physical death. The saved man's past begins to change so that his forgiven sins and remembered sorrows take on the quality of Heaven. And that is why, at the end of all things, as the sun rises on that distant shore, the Blessed of God will say, "we have always been here". What seemed as we entered it to be a veil of misery and a salt desert, as we look back, will have been, in truth, pools full of water.

Here is picture of our boys. They are all in christian schools. Ryan and Gavin are playing baseball. Pray for Chris. he has a big job raising these indians. Pray for his health, back pain and Crohn's Disease. Pray for Christine, their Nanny.

Welcome to our world!

Valerie's new nephew arrived last night in San Luis Obispo.

Brady Valen Theule. Born to Chad and Julie Theule. A gift from God Most High to us.

Like his aunt Valerie, his Latin name, Valen, means healthy and strong. A warrior.

May God's hand be upon him. May he grow and prosper. May Jesus Christ be glorified in his life.

To my wife Nancy in San Luis Obispo. Happy 43rd anniversary today beloved. Your gift should be arriving today from the hospital.

Is This All There Is?

Have you ever asked yourself this question? If you have, you're on the right track because the answer is yes or no. It is not yes and no. It is yes or no. And the choice is yours.

All of us have figured out how to fill our lives with enough activities to keep this question at bay. But ocassionally it sneaks out of the closet just long enough for us to push it back in. Don't do it.

Christmas is, perhaps, the hardest time to ask this question with the crush of activities forced upon us. Ever wonder why this pressure in December? I think sometimes the world is trying desperately to forget that this holiday is a celebration of joy to welcome the birth of Jesus our Redeemer.

But the angels rejoiced. The shepherds rejoiced. Zacharias described it best in his prophetic prayer (Luke 1:78); "the sunrise from on high shall visit us, to shine upon those who sit in darkness and the shadow of death".

So, back to the crucial question. Is this all there is?

To answer the question, we must start at death. An odd place for a father who buried a beloved daughter this year. But to death we must go because that is where God Most High takes us.

A note of acknowledgment. These biblical truths were eloquently laid down by Miles J. Stanford in his published works "The Green Letters". I highly recommend them to you.

Romans 6:5-6 speaks of a life lived here on Earth by you after you have you have died. Not a ghost. Not the future when God's people come back to live here. But today. As you live and breath and read these words.

This fundamental truth is; all resurrection life springs out of death or it is not resurrection life. The answer to the question, is this all there is?, no. There's more.

Resurrection life, the life God always intended for Adam and for us, lies just a heartbeat beyond the normal physical life of every soul.

When Val died on that dark night in April, it was, in a very real sense, her 2nd death. Her first occurred at some point in her life when she died to herself and began to live a resurrection life that brought her to the place God always intended her to be. And we had the great privilege and great pain of going with her on her last great battle.

What I am talking about is not a personal committment that causes us to busily rush around trying to grow up in the christian faith. The tragedy of this sort of thing is that our old self, like some walking deadman, is still at home and thrives, hoping that we don't ever figure it out. He knows that if we do, all is lost for him.

At a conference many years ago, Doctor Charles Schofield said it best, "Of all the needy classes of people on Earth, the neediest are not those who are having a heartbreaking, agonizing struggle for victory but those who are having no struggle at all, and no victory, and who do not know it, and are satisfied to jog along through life in a pitiable absence of all the possessions that belong to them in Christ".

God works by paradox. Success comes through failure; life springs out of death. Take a moment and go to this U-Tube link to see how this truth will forever prevail.

Click here for link

Our old self, our flesh, is infinitely pre-occupied with itself. We are good. We are excellent. We are bad. We are imperfect. We must struggle to improve. In fact, according to God, our flesh is so utterly bad, that it is beyond all recovery.

Romans 6:11 does not say reckon yourself weak unto sin. It does not say reckon yourself dying unto sin. It says reckon yourself dead. The dead do not sin. But that is impossible for us. We love our sins so much. Where can we go to find the power to do the impossible? We must go to the Cross of Calvary. Only there resides the power to deny ourself. Only there can we find our life on the resurrection side of the cross and leave behind the old self-life for the new Christ Life. The blood of Jesus Christ has procured our pardon. The cross procures our deliverance from what we are.

In Galatians 2:20, The Apostle Paul said, "I have been crucified with Christ and no longer live, but the life I now live I live by faith...". Paul lived two lives while he walked this Earth. Who he was, and who you were, was nailed to the cross with Jesus Christ. And died there. Let the dead stay forever dead.

Is this all there is? The answer is yes or no. The choice is yours

Merry Christmas Beloved

Reflections of Life

This is a picture of Ryan or Gavin (I can't tell which) on the track up at Elsinore. Paul, Chris, Gavin, and Ryan really love this sport.

Stacie Lindsay, the sister of Mark Clements from Utah sent me this link. I think you will enjoy it. I did.

Click here for link

Happy Birth Day Val

I know it’s been a while since I last Blogged. It seems like I’m running so hard just to keep up. It was Val’s Birth Day on Tuesday the 23rd,so the boys and I went there to visit. The Grave marker was just installed late last week and took forever to finish. I’m very happy how it turned out and the picture of Val looks great. The pictures are from Oak Hill Cemetery. The Cemetery was actually closed from the fires but I called and begged my way in. I have been planning this for some time with all the boy’s and we had flowers, balloons and I have not seen the marker installed so they let us in. As you can see from the pictures the sky was very Smoky from the fires.

The fires are unbelievable! We were evacuated from the house. A neighbor called and said get out ASAP and then I received the reverse 911 call telling us we had to leave as well Monday morning around 2:00am. It was just over the hill from us and you could see the flames and smoke. The winds were 40 plus and it was crazy to say the least. The fire never came down the hill and lucky the winds sent it more Southwest. If the winds were different I’m sure we would be in a hotel right now. It’s been so smoky since Monday morning it’s hard to breath.

Dawn the Nanny for the last three years moved on last Friday. She received a Paralegal Degree 4 months after Val was diagnosed but never left because it would have been to hard for us. She has been awesome and we wish her the best. The New Nanny is Kristine she worked with Dawn for the last two weeks together and took over this week. The boy’s are out of school the entire week from the fires so she is getting broken in right away. We are all very worried about Tyler and the Transition. It has to be so hard for him, he lost his Mom 6 months ago and now Dawn. Dawn was there since birth. He seems to be doing really good and really likes Kristine. I’m trying to give him extra love and attention as well. He is now potty trained and doing very well with big boy underwear. I’m so proud of him. He has been asking for Mom a lot. Even this morning he looks at lotions in the bathroom and say’s that is Mom’s, let’s go see her. Let’s go to heaven. He asked where’s her old Body and let’s go dig it up. I was trying to reason with him but he asked twice to go to heaven to see Mom. It’s so hard not to start crying and tell him that you want to go as well and why can’t we both leave right now. I just keep telling my self that God has a plan and that me and the Boy's will be stronger from it.

Ryan and Gavin have been doing well. They seem to be very happy. Ryan is really reading much better lately.

The weekends and evenings are still very difficult. I still want to call her or open the door and share my day! I still can’t believe this is reality. I look at the pictures and think back on all the good memories we had together. I’m so blessed to have such great kids and work is doing well. I’m very busy, which I guess is good.

Thanks again for all the continued support!!!!

-Chris

A Letter to Tricia

Tricia Keough is a cholangio patient from New York City. We have shared many fond conversations together. She is staying with friends in Salt Lake City.

She is dying.

Here is a letter I sent her today in care of her friend Joni:

Dear Joni:

I am Val McCrea’s (www.mccrea.blogspot.com) dad from California. Tricia and I have had many great discussions during the course of her illness.

The Apostle Paul wrote to us many letters under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Here is a letter to Tricia from me. Please read it to her.

Dear Tricia:

The God who created the Heavens and the Earth also made you in His image and after His likeness. Before He set the Sun, Moon and Stars in their course, He knew you personally. He looked ahead and saw you. He loves you. He has given you the truth in His Word. The path of life is clearly revealed in The Bible. It is like a hedge in an English garden. Outside of it’s boundaries lies only darkness and despair. All scripture is inspired by God. It is God-breathed. From Genesis to Revelation, Jesus Christ is the Grand Theme. The words I speak to you today are Holy and Truthful. Here is the central theme of all humanity. The Good News. The Best News. The Gospel of Jesus Christ. Listen and live forever in the presence of God Most High.

In Acts chapter 16, a jailer was commanded to guard Paul and Silas carefully. Upon receiving such orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in stocks. About midnight, Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening. A violent earthquake hit and shook the prison doors open. The prisoner’s chains fell off. The jailer, knowing he would be executed for losing the prisoners was about to fall on his own sword when Paul shouted, “Don’t do it. We are all here. None have escaped.” The jailer fell trembling before Paul and asked, “sirs, what must I do to be saved?” They replied, “believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved”

Dearest Tricia, the message to the Phillipian jailer is the message I deliver to you today. Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved. God is aware that you are locked in an inner prison and bound in stocks. But an Earthquake is coming that will release you just as it did for Paul and Silas. Here are some scripture references that are like lighthouses on a rocky coast. Do not be concerned about different denominations. The core of Christian belief lies in these verses.

Our present condition : Romans 3:23. For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God.

The consequence: Romans 6:23. For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord.

God’s response: Romans 5:8. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Not by our good works: Ephesians 2:8&9. For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-not by works, so that no one can boast.

Jesus knocks at the door: Revelation 3:20. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Joni Craighead [mailto:joni@radiks.net]
Sent: Saturday, August 25, 2007 5:36 PM
To: 'Stacie Lindsey'; 'Nancy Suh'; 'Richard Sloan'; 'Charlene Sloan'; 'Chris Mccrea'; 'fam'; 'Rudy Pena'; 'Betty Johnson'
Subject: RE: Tricia

Stacie –

Thank you for the update on Tricia. Please tell her that there definitely is life in Heaven above with the Lord. When Mike crossed over, he went with a smile on his face, so Heaven must be a very beautiful place. His passing was very peaceful.

Give her a big hug for me and tell her I love her.

Joni

-----Original Message-----
From: Stacie Lindsey [mailto:stacie.lindsey@gmail.com]
Sent: Friday, August 24, 2007 11:19 AM
To: Nancy Suh; Richard Sloan; Charlene Sloan; Chris Mccrea; fam; Joni Craighead; Rudy Pena; Betty Johnson
Subject: Tricia

Wanted to give you a little update on Tricia. Marianne and I went and spent a few hours with her last night. She looked good. She can't walk any more and she is on oxygen, but this has helped her speech some although it's still difficult for her to communicate in the sassy fashion we are all accustomed to, but the sass is still there (haha).

She's lost all her hair and is very worried about that, but she really looks good. She has gained 10 lbs since she came to Utah and she has not suffered any appetite loss. She is having a visitor from New York this weekend and she is anxious and excited about that. She feels nervous that her appearance makes people uncomfortable.

We had a wonderful visit. She wanted to ask Marianne some personal questions and Marianne was very graceful when talking with her about the last days of Mark's life and what it was like. She wanted to know if Mark was afraid, as she does not have confidence that there is really something after this life. She said if she felt sure, she would be ready to pack her bags and get there with her parents. Neither Marianne nor I sensed any fear in Mark as his time came close, sadness at leaving his family but not fear.

Tricia asks me every time I see her about what we believe in the after life and if I really believe her parents will be waiting for her. I know it. I know it as I know God lives. I know that all of those that have passed are well and happy and doing God's work. I know it, I just wish I could pass my confidence to Tricia so that she didn't have to be afraid.

I will see her next week as well.

Love to you all.

Stacie

Mrs. Taylor

Betty Sloan died at six this morning at Hoag Memorial Hospital in Newport Beach, California. Nancy and I were with her until 11 last night. I told her that she would be shortly leaving her worn out 88 year old body and enter the presence of God Most High. I asked her to say hello to Valerie and to tell her that we will see her soon.

In the world's eyes, Betty's departure was a struggle of breathing tubes, morphine drips and last gasps of air. We stand over a dying soul and secretly are grateful that it's not us. But to the eyes of God Most High, "precious to the Lord is the death of the saints" and "to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord."

I considered it a high privilege to spend time with Betty last night. To hold her hand and touch her forehead. To speak to her about eternity. Nancy told her that God has a place already reserved for her in heaven's choir. My mind went back to the time not so many months ago when I held the hand of my beloved Valerie. In a way, I almost envied Betty knowing that she would see Valerie in a few hours.

The picture above shows Betty in the middle with just a few of her many family members.

Elizabeth Croy Taylor Sloan was born to Mabel and Howard Croy of Hudson, Ohio on July 7th, 1919. She came into my life as a young child when she worked for my dad as a housekeeper. But she was much more than that. Eventually my dad and Betty got married but I couldn't break the habit of calling her Mrs. Taylor.

After my dad died in Ohio, Betty moved to our hometown of Escondido, California. For almost 20 years, we enjoyed her company a s member of our family. We have many fond memories of her showing up at our house in "The Betty Cruiser".

Betty's memorial service is next Saturday at The Community Reformed Church on Felicita in Escondido, California. 10 AM.

Godspeed dear one.

Come On People!

Tyler, the youngest member of the McCrea San Marcos Terrorist Cell, spent a long weekend with grandma and grandpa while Chris, Gavin, and Ryan went out to the Colorado River to enjoy the 120F temperature.

We were lagging on our departure for a Home Depot run so Tyler walks up to us and says, "come on people!" What a rock star!

We spent a hot weekend in Escondido. In the pool, hitting Costco for a Polish dog, flying kites and RC airplanes, chasing Maggie, driving RC cars, watching Charlotte's web, reading books, and feeding Sam. The usual.

Last night we celebrated Chris' 38th birthday. Unmitigated chaos developed when grandpa crash landed his big Clancy RC plane, shown above, on the neighbor's highest roof. After trotting out several ladders, some cowboy was able to lassoo it and pull it off with minimum damage.

Chris and the boys are leaving for a three week motorhome trip to Colorado today. I think they are celebrating Ryan's birthday at Char's house in Morrison. I am sure that this trip will take on a life of it's own, not unlike the recent Robin Williams movie, "RV".

A few times last weekend, Tyler would get very weepy and tell us he missed his dad. As Nancy and I consoled him, I was torn apart by his ability to "suck it in". He would put a little smile on his face but you could easily see beyond it to his pain.

I would like to be able to tell you that things are getting easier three months after losing Val. I would like to, but I can't. At night, I have dreams about her being with us and then wake up disappointed in the morning. I am fortunate in that going to work lets me plug into another world of activites. Not so with Nancy. She lost her best friend. Val would take care of her. We miss her voice when she would call and simply say, "what are you doin?"

Julie told me that she no longer thinks about Val in her diseased body that finally failed her. Instead, she thinks about her as she is today. In heaven. perfect. In the presence of Jesus and all the saints who have lived since the beginning.

God is not unaware of our pain. He knows that it is caused by our great love for Val. Although I do not at this time have a sense of His presence, I will wait for Him.

God's word is filled with commands for the saints to wait.

Psalm 5:3 In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait. Psalm 40:1 I waited for the Lord on High. I waited and He heard my cry. Isaiah 64:4 Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye has seen any God besides you, who acts on behalf of those who wait for him. Habakkuk 2:3 For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.

Just what, you ask, am I waiting for?

Not eternal life. I have that already. It is not something that starts when I leave this world stage. It is now.

In Daniel's vision of the end, he asked a man clothed in linen and suspended above the waters of a river, "My Lord, what will the outcome of all this be?" He replied, "go your way Daniel because the words are closed up and sealed until the time of the end......Go your way till the end. You will rest, and then at the end of the days you will rise to receive your alotted inheritance."

Like Daniel. Like Valerie. God's command to me is to go my way until the end.

I am waiting for the end. I will live each day with joy, knowing that it is a gift from God's hand. I will die. I will rest. and then at the end of the days i will rise to receive my inheritance.

Nate

Julie and the grommets (Paul's code name for Kyle, Julie Ann, and Nate) drove down from San Luis Obispo last Thursday. I was talking to Nate over the weekend and asked him where Aunt Valerie was. I watched his wheels churn as he pondered the question. "In Heaven," said Nate. "What's she doing there," I asked. "Waiting for us," was his immediate response. Great wisdom can reside in little hearts.

Shortly after Val died, Julie told me that if she and Chad ever have another child, she is going to name her Valerie if it is a girl, or Val if it is a boy. Either way, we would have another Val in our life. What a blessing that would be. A little soul to stand in the gap until we see our beloved again. What a reunion that would be when we get to Heaven. Val would meet her namesake and we would enjoy two Vals for eternity.

I am reminded of the story of Job. In the beginning, he was the richest man in the east and had seven sons and three daughters. He lost all his wealth and all his children. In the end, God rewarded his righteousness and perseverence. He doubled Job's material possessions and blessed him with seven sons and three daughters. Why didn't God double his children as he did his wealth? He did. Although Job's ten children were killed in the beginning, he never lost them. Today, he enjoys the presence of twenty children in Heaven.

Gavin went back to San Luis Obispo with Julie. I heard that he is enjoying being there. That shouldn't be a surprise. He is missing his mom and Julie reminds him of her. Paul and I are leaving Temecula at 3 am Saturday to pick him up. Chad and Kyle flew out of SLO today to do some fly fishing in Oregon.

Gabriel

Nancy just sent me an e-mail entitled "Through a Child's Eyes". This is one of the letters written to God.

Recently, Nancy received a book about a woman who died and came back to life. In the process, she met two angels who told her about a life she lived in eternity past ( I am not sure where or when that is). There are many stories of people meeting angels in our world but the thing that I have noticed is that the stories don't seem to fit too well into the truth revealed to us in the Bible.

And that brings me to Gabriel. Come along with me if you want to hear a really exciting angel story.

Gabriel first steps into history when he is dispatched by God Most High to reveal to Daniel the future of mankind and the Earth. You can read about it in Daniel Chapters 8 and 9.

The next time we meet Gabriel, he appears to Zechariah, a priest in Israel. Gabriel speaks to Zechariah, "Your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to give him the name John. He will be a joy and delight to you....He will be great in the sight of the Lord....he will be filled with the Holy Spirit from birth....he will go before the Lord in the spirit and power of Elijah. Wow! How would you like to have an angel appear to you with that news?

Like Abraham and Sarah, Zechariah and his wife Elizabeth were senior citizens. Like Abraham and Sarah, they were childless.

Initially, Zechariah was gripped with fear at the appearance of the angel. After listening to Gabriel's message, Zechariah's fear turns to unbelief. "How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years."

I can sense Gabriel's frustration as he responds; "I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I have been sent to speak to you and to tell you this good news. And now you will be silent and not able to speak until the day this happens, because you did not believe my words, which will come true at their proper time.

So Zechariah goes home, unable to speak. Elizabeth becomes pregnant. I am sure he told Elizabeth, in writing, about the appearance of Gabriel.

In the sixth month of Elizabeth's pregnancy, God sent Gabriel to Nazareth with a message for a virgin whose name was Mary. His first words; "Greetings you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you." Although Mary was greatly troubled at what kind of a greeting this might be, she was not gripped with fear as was Zechariah. Gabriel tells Mary that she will have a son and will name Him Jesus.

Mary is not filled with doubt,as was Zechariah. Just a legitimate question; "How can this be since I am a virgin?"

Gabriel speaks; "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you."

Mary's faith and obedience are revealed in her response; "I am the Lord's servant. may it be to me as you have said." What a contrast to Zechariah's fear and unbelief.

Now that's an angel story!

Wish you were an angel? Not me. Unlike us, angels have never experienced faith and hope. They love and obey God but the simple fact of the matter is, they have always stood in His presence. They have always walked by sight. We walk by faith and hope. That is why Paul said, "and now remain faith, hope, and love."

We celebrated Father's Day this weekend at Paul's house in Temecula. Nancy, Gavin, Tyler and I arrived before Chris and Ryan, who were coming from a baseball game. Tyler and I were hanging out in Paul's front yard when Chris' Expedition rolled up. With dark tinted windows, you really can't see the driver. Tyler saw the car, turned to me and said, "momma's here." My knees buckled.

Janet Sloan's mom, Barbara Shimer has been in ICU at Palomar for several days with a so far undiagnosed low sodium condition. Please pray for wisdom for the doctors and God's healing hand on Barbara.

And finally, for those of you who choose to subject yourselves to my "too long" Tribute to Val at her memorial service, the video links below will take you there. Since You-Tube has a 10 minute or 100 Meg limit per clip, it is mercifully divided into Part One and Part Two, it's sequel.

Part One

Part Two

Dark Days

These are Dark days for everyone whose lives were enriched by Val's presence. It is especially hard when we listen to the sound of silence in the McCrea house on Via Vera Cruz. The only word to describe it is "empty". It just doesn't seem right. Val should be here with us. Why wouldn't God zap all the monsters running around our world killing people and leave our beloved Val?

Habakkuk had the same question. He saw only injustice, violence, and evil in Israel. But God was silent and invisible. Why was there no answer when he cried out for help? How long Habakkuk waited for God's response we don't know. But Listen to God Most High as he answers Habakkuk and us;

Then the Lord replied:

"Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so a herald may run with it. For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and not delay......The righteous shall live by faith."

It is impossible for me to see God's plan at work in the loss of my daughter. But this one thing I know; the future belongs to God.

And at the end, Habakkuk's prayer should be the cry of our heart;

"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet will I rejoice in the Lord. I will be joyful in God my Saviour."

Gavin and Ryan had their end of the year graduations at Valley Bible Church last Friday. Chris' cousin Lisa, a dietician from Denver, was in to visit. Chris and the boys were dirt bike riding Saturday. Pray for Chris. He is trying to close some big business deals this week. Nancy and I went to the fair yesterday. I couldn't talk her into eating rattlesnake. Julie is coming down on the 21st. I think Gavin is going back with her to spend some time in San Luis Obispo. Tyler continues to be checked out on grandpa. Chris and the boys are planning a motor home trip to Colorado soon.

Here is a clip of some comments from Nancy and Julie at Val's Memorial Service:

Click here for video

Mary Anne's Tribute to Val

Mary Anne Rose was a business colleage and good friend of Valerie. Although she got married and moved to Michigan, Mary Anne would come to California whenever she could during Val's illness.

Good friends are a blessing from God. Thanks Mary Anne.

Please click the link below and enjoy the video.

Click here for video

Char's Tribute To Val

This picture was taken in December of 2005. Char, Michael, Chris, and Val are leaving Carlsbad Airport for Santa Monica. Nancy and I met them the next day at Cedars Sinai for a meeting with Andy Klein, Nick Nissen, and Noam Drazin.

I heard unconfirmed rumors of an upscale hotel and a night of shopping on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills.

Char always felt a special bond with Val. From the outside, one could see that they were kindred spirits. Look at the picture. They even look alike.

Char brought so much to our battle. Her compassion and ability to make things happen. To knock down barriers and cut to the chase. Her Time. Her money.

Thanks Char. God Most High has not missed your involvement in our dear Valerie's life. I am sure she speaks highly of you to the Lord Jesus.

Click on the link below and enjoy!

Click here for video

Jeff's Tribute To Val

Sorry I have been so long in publishing some video clips of Val's memorial service. It took a while to come up the learning curve of movie publishing. Over the next few days, I will publish the tributes to Val from Char, Mary Anne, and myself.

Today I wanted to publish Jeff's tribute. He is a Lieutenant-Colonel in the Air Force and is leaving on June 5th to serve as a Squadron Commander in Korea for one year. He was also with Val when she left our world for her true home.

Click here for video

Val's Graveside Service

Click on the link below to watch a video of Val's graveside service at Oak Hill Memorial Park in Escondido.

As you watch, know that her body is in God's loving care just waiting for that day when He will reach down into the Earth and lift her up into the clouds to meet the Lord in the air.

She is very much alive as I write these words, beloved, but on that day, her Earthly body will be raised and in a moment, in the twinkling of the eye, her Heavenly body will emerge.

Just as the caterpillar is buried in a cocoon waiting for metamorphosis into a butterfly, so Valerie's body waits for that day.

CLICK HERE

Video of Padre's Game on Mother's day

Here is a link to a 5 minute video of the Padre's game on Mother's Day. we were the guests of Trevor Hoffman, the Padre's closing pitcher. You can see him coming to the mound after Hell's Bells is played. Ryan was the announcer who said, "play ball". There was a tribute to Val on the field monitor. Watch closely. It's easy to miss. The picture above shows it.

Click here to view video

Software Issue

If you can't see the pictures on Val's slideshow, please download Flashplayer. That will resolve the problem.

"Mother's Day 2007"

We had a great day at Petco Park today as guests of Trevor Hoffman, the Padre's closing pitcher. Ryan was the announcer that said, "Play Ball!" We will post a video clip soon.

Val's life was a gift to us. It is with great joy that we can share a slideshow of her life. Please click on the link below and make sure you have your computer sound on.

Enjoy! From the Sloan and McCrea Family

The link to Val's slideshow:
Our Beloved

Travel Lightly In This World

Most of us who travel by air are constantly pushing against the 50 pound per suitcase weight limit. We all carry too much baggage in this life. Never ready for a hasty departure. Such was not the case on the night God commanded His people Israel to leave Egypt.

On that night, after Pharaoh had endured nine plagues, the Lord revealed to Moses that all the first-born in Egypt would be killed by the death angel. He commanded that a spotless male lamb be slain at twilight. One for each family. The sides and tops of the doorframes were to be covered with the blood of the lamb. The death angel would see the blood and passover that house.

Good Most High must be an artist in His heart because He has painted so many pictures for us. In the beginning, the shedding of blood to cover our sins required a lamb for a man. At the time of Moses, it was a lamb for a family. Later it was a lamb for a nation. Do you see where this is going? At Calvary, we beheld the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. The next time you sing "Mary had a little lamb, it's fleece was white as snow", remember Mary's perfect lamb, Jesus, who has become the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

Back to that night in Egypt. God gave instructions to roast the meat of the lamb over an open fire and to eat it with bitter herbs and unleavened bread. The fire pictures God's wrath that was poured out on His Son for us. The meat was a picture of what Jesus said at His last supper in Jerusalem. "Take, eat, this is my body given for you". The bitter herbs are to remind us of the bitterness that our sin produces. The unleavened bread reminds us that a little bit of leaven corrupts and causes us to be puffed up.

The people were told to eat in haste and be ready to leave at a moment's notice. Their cloak tucked into their belt, sandals on their feet and staff in the their hand. During the night, Pharaoh commanded Moses to leave Egypt. They left in haste and camped by the sea near Pi Hahiroth.

Pharaoh changed his mind and pursued the Israelites. His armies, like the death angel that had struck the first-born of Egypt, surrounded them. The inevitable outcome was genocide and death at the edge of the Red Sea. Moses stretched out his hands and the Lord drove the sea back with a strong east wind until the sea bed was dry. All the people passed over to the promised land. When the armies of Pharaoh pursued them, Moses stretched out his hand and they were drowned when the sea returned to it's place. The picture at the top is the Red Sea looking toward the Promised Land.

Once again, God has painted a picture of what occurs when we reach the end of our sojourn on Earth. We are pursued to the sea by the angel of death. There is no escape unless God provides a way across to the promised land. Just as He did for Israel, He does for us. For my beloved Val, this is a historical event. For me, it is in future.

A few days ago, Tyler and I were in the car together. he said, "momma in Heaven. I want to go there". God's Spirit reveals great wisdom to two-year olds. He knows that she is in a very real place. He misses her as we all do. To me, Heaven has taken on a new dimension of being closer since my beloved is there.

Hosea asks two questions in Hosea 13:14, "Where o death is your victory? Where oh grave is your sting?" Just as the armies of Egypt were swallowed up by the Red Sea, Paul provides us the answer to Hosea's questions in I Corinthians 15:54. "Death has been swallowed up in victory."

Rick Pollock, a friend of Mark Clements and web developer from Salt Lake City, is putting the final touches on a slide show of Val's life. Soon to be published here. Also, we will shortly link a clip of Val's graveside and memorial service through You-Tube. Stay tuned.

This Sunday, Mother's Day, we were invited by Trevor Hoffman, the Padre's closing pitcher (Hell's Bells for all you Padres fans) to share his box behind homeplate for the game. They are going to do a tribute to Val on the stadium big screen.

Day to Day

I wanted to say Thank You to all the people that attended Val’s Memorial Service. It was just an incredible testament to the beautiful giving person she was. There were so many of her friends there, it was nice to see all the support. The rain was so fitting and the Rainbow’s that every one witnessed going home to San Diego and Orange County were Val showing us she is in Heaven and doing just fine. Val’s was such an incredible women!! She always cared so much about other people and how they were doing. Even when the call came that she had a rare form of Liver Cancer and that she only had months left she cared even more about others than her self. She never once complained about herself or her situation even thru 18 straight months of being on Chemo. She was always uplifting and was more worried about the kids or how I was doing. I’m not saying that she was not worried about herself but she always had that incredible gift to give way more than she took, always!! Everyone loved her so much for that.

It’s been so difficult with her not around. Sunday was always Church / Family day and just hanging out around the house. It was very difficult with her not around today. Last Sunday I took Ryan and Gavin Motocross riding for the first time since earlier Nov. They had a blast. I’m keeping very busy with them between Baseball and School. It’s just like a have a huge part of my heart ripped out and there is no way for any one to fix it. We were married for over 11 years and knew each other for 6 years before. With my health problems over the last 5 years Val always joked about getting a new husband at 55 because I wouldn’t be around anymore. This was only in a joking sense, but she was so healthy and it was just the big joke.

Today I decided to replace our old worn out Bedspread that was falling apart. I’ve never bought one before or at least for the last 13 years. This was Val’s position on the team. She was the expert shopper and always came home with things for the house and our room to show me. It was so hard going out today getting something that she normally would do. I was going to call a couple of her friends to asked where I should go or if they wanted to come along to help, but I figured that I need to start learning this thread count stuff and bedding language on my own.

At night after the kids are asleep that was our time to talk and hangout. Now the house is so quiet and there is nobody to talk with. The pain I’m feeling now was unimaginable before. I know she has been very sick for the last 6 months and that this disease dose not have any percents of positive outcomes associated with it but we always wanted to hold on to the hope that she would be the one. She never wanted to talk about, what if. She only wanted to talk about when I’m better we will do. We all wanted to believe that would be the outcome. I guess what I’m trying to say is that even if you know it’s not good, it’s very hard to prepare until it really happens and then it’s so overwhelming. It’s one of those things that you can never really be ready for.

I just know that she is in a better place and is now Pain Free… She went thru so much the last 18 months with all the hospital visits.

I really want to say Thank You to Richard and Nancy for all their dedication and Love. Thanks to Amy Nelson for the coordinating all the Dinners and to all the friends that have brought them over. Char you gave so much over the last 18 months too. Always ready to help even if there was 1,000 miles between. Val loved you so much. You are one incrediable Aunt!! Dawn you were with Val so much the last 18 months. She loved you for all your help and support. You were there for her with whatever she needed. Thank You for all your support with Val and awesome care of the Boy's! Val and I were so lucky to have picked such an incredible neighborhood to live in for almost 4 years. It has been such a blessing to have neighbors that are willing to do what ever to help out from the bottom of there hearts. Also, it brought us to Valley Christian School and this was another huge blessing. All the parents and staff are the best!! We have only been there two years, but it feels like family. Val loved all the Moms in the “Moms in Touch” group too. They were such good friends to her. I can’t possibly say thanks to everyone, just know the McCrea Family is very grateful for all the love and support!!

Val was always looking forward to becoming a Mother. When that opportunity came with the birth of Ryan she could not have been any happier. That continued with Gavin and Tyler. She was such an incredible Mother who did so much for her Boys. Gavin was her tender heart and he had such a close bond with her. I will really need to work on filling this void. I can be Dad; it’s easy with three boys.

I’m so blessed to have three beautiful Boys’ from her. I want to share with the boys all the great memories of Val in the future. If you have any great Val stories and want to share them feel free to post them under the comments or email them to me at mccreach@yahoo.com

-Chris

A Big Hole

Valerie's departure has left a big hole in our lives. It has been especially hard this week. Everyone is gone. Dawn is in Colorado. I stop to see Chris and the boys on the way home from work. Gav and I played Life last night. Ryan went to baseball practice. Gav and Chris went out to practice ball. I was sitting next to Tyler, who was was sleeping on the couch. The house was very still and there was a feeling of emptiness. A big hole.

Saturday morning. We all went to Ryan's baseball game at Bradley Field this morning. Chris and Gavin are at his game as I write. Nancy put Tyler down for a nap and is doing some laundry. Chris and I had a good discussion about money. An important subject. Nancy is planning to take the train to Julie's in San Luis Obispo Monday morning. I am thinking about taking Tyler and going up to SLO on Friday. Tammy just called and invited us to a barbecue at her house this afternoon.

Life has this strange habit of going on in spite of our circumstances. I have struggled all week at work just trying to be productive. David Broad, our General Manager called me into his office yesterday and asked if I would speak to all our employees about Val. She was on (2) chemotherapies that we make where I work. I did and was amazed at the end of a 5 minute talk. Many were in tears when I finished. I was thanking them for all their hard work for Val and thousands of other patients just like her.

Nancy asked me how I feel this week. The only word that came to mind was "empty". I was in the Costco parking lot and fantasized that my phone rang. It was Val. She wanted to meet me. I asked her where? She said right where you are.

I have hesitated to write to you beloved, because I have been very sad that Val is in Heaven and I am on Earth. The separation for me is very painful. But today, the Lord reminded me that Val is meeting all those christians in my family and Nancy's family that have gone before us. This is especially pleasant since no one in our immediate family are christians so these saints of previous generations were unknown to us. Also, Julie told me that in Val's last days in her body, she whispered to her to say hello to Tim Sharp and Randy Moersch for her.

Chad is working hard on linking Val's Slideshow shown at her memorial service to this blog. You will love it.

Godspeed Beloved

Sisters

Sisters have played a major role in the comfort Richard and I have received. Richard's sister Char has been here for awhile, working to give our dear Val every advantage possible. Thank you Char.

My sisters Judy and Janet arrived from Michigan and stood beside us as we walked step by step through the homegoing of Valerie. They were tireless in cooking, cleaning, laundry, answering the phone, arranging flowers and helping me. A mistake had been made. Their names did not appear in the Memorial service bulletin. I want them to know how much it meant to me to have them here. Thank you for coming. It meant the world to me.

One afternoon as I was watering the flowers on my deck, my dear Janet grabbed the hose and sprayed the whole back end of my pants. I shrieked because the water was so cold. Of course, I did the same thing to her. When she was sufficiently doused, we laughed until we cried! We needed that after the intensity of so many days. Thank you both for your love!

My Sisters in Christ at Emmanuel Faith have been holding me up in prayer. I can feel the love, peace and comfort!

Valerie's sisters in Christ have been amazing. Our friend Sondra brought Valerie's prescriptions to her home on a regular basis. One day she not only had the prescriptions but also brought her rubber gloves and cleaning supplies. She cleaned all four bathrooms. Mary bought the boys clothes for the memorial service. Deanna, April, Steph and Kelli have helped so much. There have been so many gifts. I will ever stand amazed at the love that has been shown to my daughter. Food has been coming in for 18 months and will continue until Chris and the boys are ready to launch out on their own. Before hospice sent a night nurse, some of her dearest friends rom Valley Bible slept two at a time on sofas next to her. They helped her to the bathroom, gave her massages, changed her clothes, read the Bible to her and gave her the Roxinol for pain. One morning, I came close to Val's face and kissed her. She said, "my friends?" with a big smile on her face. I said, "its mom." There have been church services at her home because it was too difficult for the family to physically get there. Tami, Chris, Karee, Osil, Theresa and Diane are from Valley Bible. This is not a thank you list. It is an example of some of the sisterhood and love that exists at the school Ryan and Gavin attend. With an attitude of prayer in all things and a daily devotion to the Lord and each other, they have obeyed God.

John 14:23 "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him and we will come to him and make our home with him. He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me."

John 15:12 "My command is this: Love one another as I have loved you.

We Love You Sisters

ps: If possible, please leave your name even if the top portion says anonymous

Valerie Ann McCrea

San Diego Union Tribune

Continued Support

You are invited to celebrate Val's life on:

Friday, April 20th at 2:30 pm
at Emmanuel Faith Church
639 East Felicita (corner of 17th Ave)
Escondido, CA 92025
Click This Link For Directions
_______________________________

A special graveside service for "family and close friends" will be held on:

Friday, April 20th at 1:00 pm
at Oak Hill Memorial Park
2640 Glenridge Road
Escondido, CA 92027
Click This Link For Directions

If you would like to show your continued support for Val's battle, in lieu of sending flowers, we would request that you send donations to either...

San Diego Hospice
4311 3rd Ave
San Diego, Cal 92103
Attn: Foundation, in memory of Valerie McCrea

or

Cholangiocarcinoma Care Foundation
175 S. Main
Suite 975
Salt Lake City, Ut 84103
In memory of Valerie McCrea


The McCrea and Sloan families

Celebration

At 7:00 pm on October 20, 1968, only a few thousand spectators remained in Mexico City's Olympic Stadium. Finally they heard the wail of police sirens. A lone runner wearing the colors of Tanzania staggered into the stadium. John Stephan Akhawari was the last contestant to finish the 26.2 mile race. His leg injured in a fall, bloodied and crudely bandaged, He hobbled the final lap around the track.

The crowd rose to their feet and applauded as if he were the Gold Medal Champion. After the race, a reporter asked why he had not quit. His reply, "My country did not send me 7,000 miles to start the race. They sent me to finish it."

Three days after this event, another great runner was born. Valerie Ann Sloan.

Last Sunday night, Val was that runner, injured and alone, approaching the Mexico City Arena. But inside were waiting "that great cloud of witnesses" that God has declared were watching her. And all of you were there, as was the Lord Jesus Himself. She finished the race and our Lord declared, "Well done. Welcome home."

The Lord Jesus had a moment in the Garden of Gethsemane where he was tempted to quit the race. But as he prayed, God the Father reminded Him that He did not send Him to start the race but to finish it. Our Saviour finished His race at Calvary, and declared, "it is finished."

Val fought the good fight. Some might say she lost the battle. Many said that when our Lord died on that dark day. But death could not hold Him. And death can not hold our beloved.

Jesus, our great Redeemer, conquered it.

You are invited to celebrate Val's life on Friday, April 20th at 2:30 pm at Emmanuel Faith Church, 639 East Felicita, Escondido, California 92025. For those of you who can't make it, a video will be available on UTube. We will post a link to it soon.

A graveside service for family and close friends will be held on Friday April 20th at 1:00 pm. at Oak Hill Memorial Park, 2640 Glenridge Road, Escondido 92027.


Godspeed Beloved

Godspeed Beloved

Our beautiful girl left us for Heaven's bright shore tonight at 10:00 PM. She has joined that great cloud of witnesses that surround us as we run the race that is set before us. We loved her with an everlasting love. I whispered to her that I have always been with her and will be with her forever. I will never leave her. She is my beloved and I have been so blessed to have her in my life. She has been a light to me and to many others. I count it as one of the highest privileges of my life to have traveled with her on this 18 month journey into darkness. Through it all the Lord Jesus Himself has been a light unto our path and a light unto our feet.

Godspeed Beloved Richard

Sacred Prayers

Last night at 8 pm, we gathered around Valerie for a sacred prayer. Her blood pressure was 100 over zero. Our dear Ryan prayed twice during this blessed time. Diane Burke, our African American sister in Christ and Hospice Nurse joined us. At the time of this post, our dear one continues to breath on. It is a high privilege to hear her and hold her hand. I will sneak up for a few hours of sleep and leave her in Dianne's loving care.

Godspeed

Double Peak

For those of you who have been to Val's house, if you look south, you will see

Double Peak, the mountain with the walking trail going up the side. I ran up to the summit last night. It was cold and cloudy. A strong wind was blowing in from the ocean. I spent some time in prayer and left Val's name in stone. As I was coming down, I had a vision of Val running up the trail to meet me. I asked the Lord if I could meet her on this trail the first time we meet again in Heaven. He assured me that he would make it so.

Greg Lane, Val's College Pastor from Emmanuel Faith came over last night. We had an intimate time sharing old memories and praying together.

Julie arrived last night about midnight. Nancy's sisters, Janet and Judy, are flying in this afternoon from Michigan. Jeff, Val's oldest brother, is arriving from Alabama tonight.

Walt Disney died before Disney World and EPCOT Center were opened. Mr. Disney's wife Lillian was at the dedication when a friend leaned over and said how wonderful it would be if Walt could have seen it. Lillian responded, he did see it. That is why it is here. He saw what was unseen.

Like Mr. Disney, our eyes see the unseen by faith.

And faith, beloved, is tested by fire to prove that it is real and true. 1st Peter 1: 7 says, "These have come so that your faith....may be proved genuine."

The eyes of the faithful are described in 2nd Corinthians 4:18; "so we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

Like Mr. Disney, our hearts Believe the unbelievable by faith.

Romans 8:28 is perhaps one of the most unbelievable promises in scripture. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."

Physically, Val's condition is unchanged. She is young and strong. Her body just keeps on keeping on. A testament to the majestic power of God in creating us. Continue to pray that Val will be raised back to health.

Godspeed

Running The Race

I love this picture taken at The Torrey Pines Inn. Nobody was ready for the shot. Look at Char and Nancy trying to organize the troop. Me reading to Kyle. Life is a lot like that. Never organized. Never ready for the next moment.

Nothing has changed. We aren't ready to let Val go and lose the privelege of her company for the rest of our journey on Earth. But let go we must. She is Heaven bound and nothing will stop her. I do still pray that God has it on His radar screen to return her to us at the last moment.

Val and I ran together a lot over the years. I was pretty fast but she was always faster. One summer day we were cranking up Teepee Hill in Escondido. I was pushing hard but she smoked me. We ran a lot on Black Mountain in Rancho Bernardo. I got in the habit of memorizing scripture while I run. I also like to say it out loud. One day, I was in Phillipians and got to the part where Paul said, "watch out for those dogs." Val jumped into my arms thinking we were under attack! Another time, we were out in an area with bee hives. She sucked one in and got stung on the lip. Char was telling me about a run with Val at her home in Colorado. Elevation 7,000 feet for you sea level wimps. Anyway, Char mentioned that one of her neighbors was a nudist (she lives in a very rural area of the mountains). I don't think Val believed her until they ran past a naked guy watering his lawn.

Like the Apostle Paul, Val has run the race. She has finished the course. Listen to Paul's words. There is nothing new under the sun. The same apply to our beloved.

For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

Physically, Val continues to decline. She is on a pain pump. The nurse added an oxygen tube to her nose today for comfort. She is also on a ??? suppository for stress. Everyone who loves her is around. I think she most likes the holy whispering from her mom into her ear. Paul is coming over tonight. Julie is coming down tomorrow. Nancy's sisters, Janet and Judy, are flying in tomorrow. Osil's husband has been kind in sending a limo (from his business) to pick them up at the airport. Jeff is coming from Alabama in the next couple of days. He is an F16 Squadron Commander being deployed to the Korean Peninsula in June.

Val is enjoying christian music from Nancy's IPOD into her ears.

Godspeed

We Are All Praying Together

This picture symbolizes what Val has done in her own special way. She has brought a lot of people together over the past 18 months. These people are family, friends, and friends of friends from all across the country and they have come here to wish Val the very best and to pray that her suffering will end. We also pray that her pain will diminish. Many of the people who visit this blog daily are friends for life, and many visitors are people who have joined in along the way. I think that several of us visiting have learned that life should not be taken for granted, but rather we should cherish each moment that we have with our family and friends. Thanks again for all your prayers and help as we continue to pray for Val.

Val had a lot of energy today, relatively speaking. She wanted to get out of bed and walk around at 7:00am. I was reading a book to Tyler right next to Val and Char in the living room. When I’m reading and Tyler see’s people with sad faces in the book he says “mad, mad face”. I was trying to make a mad face and right after that Val started to do this with her face. I didn’t think she fully understood what we were saying and 5 seconds later she had Char and I laughing. Then Tyler got more involved and he was trying to make his own mad face. It was just one of those moments that were special.

She is having more problems with the pain relief, so Hospice put her on a Pump tonight to help smooth out her pain. She is still trying to play Mom and tell the boys what to do. She was trying to tell Tyler to put on his pants this morning. She is having problems letting go. Her mind is so strong. I think she gets this from all the running she use to do. When you are in pain running its mind over body and she is an expert at it. She once was running so much each week she stress fractured her lower leg and had to be in a cast for 6 weeks. I guess what I’m trying to say is she is such a fighter and with the Boy’s it’s not easy to say I give up.

Please pray that she can let her mind rest and the pain pump works well.

THANKS for all the beautiful comments and all the effort with the Meals!!

-Chris